I am not a good student, I regret to admit,
I can teach you my ways, like a bad student kit.
The first step is easy, just lose all motivation,
and maintain the same mindset you do on vacation.
Follow this step by my recommended routine
of ditching frequently--but avoid being seen!
As a bad student I find it an absolute truth
to live off of donuts, though somewhat uncouth.
This sugar is necessary if you want to succeed-
for the coma is crucial for you to achieve.
Remember to fall asleep at appropriate times--
in classes after three and all those before nine.
And never, not ever, break the cardinal rule
of really listening to teachers, don't be a fool!
For although they are smart and know all kinds of stuff,
Everything learned after high school is fluff.
There is no room after that, your head is too full!
So just leave it alone, don't be tempted to mull.
When you graduate from high school you can't take anymore,
due to advanced placement classes and career planning galore!
I have been planning and planning since I was in the sixth grade,
and I am exhausted from thinking about how I intend to be paid.
Should I be an actress? A lawyer? A doctor?
Should I write a great novel or try flying a 'copter?
Should I take the GRE or maybe the DAT?
All those tests seem to come from the Cat in the Hat
Alas this is how to be a become a bad student,
by ignoring all calls to be wise and be prudent.
I hope you will heed these words of advice,
in my vast experience they have surely sufficed.
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